Ethos
Sometimes that’s all we can do. Love them and leave a good impression on them, so when they grow up and look back, they hold no contempt for us. If I’ve done that, then I’m successful, as bittersweet as it may be.
I made the decision to not let society define me. I know my character. I know I’m not the things society says I am. I know I didn’t choose this orientation. Once you realize that, you’ll be free.
We can’t choose our thoughts and feelings; only our actions. If you know in your mind that you wish no harm, that you have no bad intentions. If you have feelings of love and nurture, you are not a monster. If you know and accept your character, no one can take that away from you
Every night, I find myself lying awake, longing for Lucy. I can’t shut my brain off. I watch TV, I listen to music, I read… but I can’t fall asleep, and I lay there missing her. Why do I have to carry this burden?
I wish I could know whether we’ll end up together in the end, or if she’ll move on without me. Without this closure, I’m stuck in limbo, unable to move on, myself. The odds aren’t in my favor. They never are. I hate this.
Re: Power Imbalance and relationship role
Antis and nons always talk about a power imbalance, and question our role in a relationship. “How can you be a lover, a friend, and a guardian at the same time?” Do we have to define it? Why can’t it just be what it is? It’s not a traditional relationship. It’s unique to MAPs. What
I’d do anything for you baby girl. You mean the world to me. You’re my best friend. My love. Anything for you. 💕👩👧
Forever grieving
I have always been able to get over adult girlfriends within a month after a break up. But when a girl child is taken out of my life by parents or other extenuating circumstances, I can’t get over them. I’m forever grieving. It hurts. There’s no closure. And I’m left wondering what could have been.
It’ll be 8 years before she’s 18. I don’t know if I’ll see her again before she’s 18, or even after. Am I delusional to wait for her for that long, with no guarantee we’ll end up together in the end? I really don’t wanna be with anyone else, though.
I’ve always felt that if the world could understand us, we wouldn’t be persecuted, we wouldn’t be feared, and we could interact with the ones we’re attracted to, freely. Cause if people understood, they would have no problem with us.